Prowling Lions

As I am waiting to start the SheReadsTruth prayer devotion tomorrow, I decided to read Proverbs 31 this morning. For two reasons, I woke up this morning feeling victory over the enemy and feeling very grateful {in general but also for specific reasons}. Yesterday, when I read Chavon Taylor’s first blogpost I was reminded that in Heaven I will no longer be tired. Last night, when Ryan Hamon spoke at Impact I was reminded that God has beaten Satan already and that I was leaving room to be tempted into bitterness during my multiple night wakings. Today, I am going to write about all of that and more:

.

“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour”

1 Peter 5:8

Man, have I felt that for the last-oh-8 months. I didn’t even know I was feeling it. But, it became clear last night as I put Ryder in his crib and it became abundantly clear as I woke this morning feeling refreshed…along with waking last night feeling refreshed and again last night still feeling refreshed {a refreshment that only comes from the Lord}. I was up just as much last night as I have been all week but my attitude was new and different. I have been praying on loop for weeks that God would give Ryder, and in turn me, more sleep. I have gladly woken up multiple times a night for my sweet baby for almost 8 months now but I have only very recently begun to get really sad about it. I have started to let it overcome me. I have not been sad that I have been waking up but I have been sad that I have not felt the Lord answering my prayer. Not even my prayerS, just my one prayer. I have cried out nightly for Him to show me what I am supposed to be learning during this process. How this nightly routine is teaching me something? How I am to grow through this? But, I haven’t felt anything and I think it’s because I was only looking for my answer to be MORE SLEEP. “Just a 4 hour stretch tonight, Lord, please?” And, I have found myself becoming discouraged because I started to think that I wasn’t asking for much. Why isn’t He giving it to me? I’m not asking the world here, Lord, I just want more sleep.

But last night as I prayed for Ryder while he slept in His crib I prayed a new prayer. Actually, I scream prayed a new prayer {in my head, of course. Don’t wake my sleeping baby}. I told the devil that he has no business in my home and he is not welcome here. I cried out that the God I serve has defeated him and will always and forever be victorious over him. This battle isn’t ongoing. It’s won. The battle in my heart is ongoing, however. I cried out to the Lord in apologetic tones. How selfish I am! So, I gently kissed my sons head, went and kissed my husband goodnight, and read a little of 2 Timothy before I fell asleep. 4 hours later, Ryder woke but I felt more rested than I have in a long time. I felt the kind of rest that can only mean my SOUL had found rest. I was at peace with being awake and I was praising the Lord from the moment I woke. And, I continued to praise throughout the rest of the night and now I sit writing this refreshed even though I slept no more than normal.

It’s all about attitude, y’all. God is sovereign and He’s going to get what He wants, regardless of what we think. He wants me, us, to run to Him. He desires to be our everything. So, why wouldn’t we oblige? Why don’t I take up the cross every single day and find refuge in HIS strength when I am weak? Because, most of the time my attitude sucks. Most of the time I am selfish even in my kindness. Most of the time I find flaws where He says I’m redeemed. Most of the time All of the time I am a sinner that doesn’t recognize the depths and grossness of my sin.

Watch out for that lion. He’s waiting in the wings, in your thoughts, in your midst. He’s waiting and will wait as long as he needs to try and steal you from the Lord. He’s patient. Don’t let him devour you.

I was going to write about Proverbs 31 today too but I think it would be better for a later blogpost. But, let me just say that Proverbs 31 teaches you best how to be the kind of woman revered by God. It’s awesome. If you haven’t read it, read it. If you have read it, read it again and learn something new!

God is good, y’all. And He’s faithful even when we’re not. He can’t deny Himself.